OH NO. i just typed a long entry, lost it, and now i have to go take a shower with antibacterial soap because i have surgery tomorrow morning. i will be out for a while. please visit my home. i'll be here with sherbert, not wanting to eat it, or even breathe in it's lovely scent. oh tonsils/turbinates, please get out with as little pain and angst as possible. 

frick i'm scared. send me your love. 

-- julie

i am a huge fan of mcsweeney's and monsieur eggers in general. he is a sarcastic son of a bitch and is good to throw a book of his in between The Jungle and Jude the Obscure just to mix things up... but i am looking for someone with a copy of You Shall Know Our Velocity (also by Eggers) just for the hell of it.

also, if anyone is looking for a new book of poetry, my suggestions will always be "The Cinnamon Peeler" or "Handwriting" by Michael Ondaatje or Mary Oliver's "American Primitive" or anything. no idea why i am doling out suggestions. i guess i am just bored. i have to make a lasagna for dinner very soon because i said i would.

in other news, the paul (IV) bet me that his baseball team would have a better record than my lacrosse team by the end of playoffs-- and since i CLEARLY won, he has to make good on our agreement (which originally entitled me to health food via the co-op but has lapsed into me choosing two large boxes of cereal, most likely fruity/cocoa pebbles because those are FANTASTICALLY sugary boxes of deliciousness and my deathwish as a needlephobic is clearly to become diabetic. whoops.

i'll shut up now. if you have a copy of YSKOV hanging around for the borrowing, please let me know. i have books to trade and lend and barter. screw the library. i'm striking out on my own.

*sigh* this might be the last summer of blog. you may have noticed that i haven't written in a while. diving right in, patsy requested graduation details. basically, i graduated in the valedictory group for MHS (there were twelve of us) and read a poem of mine in the ceremony with kris gruen (as did emmett) and then i went to project grad and then i left project grad early to get some shut-eye before the next day's championship lacrosse game for D2 against U32. while we lost, miserably, i still got my first medal ever. my obligations to the public school system here are officially null and void. woo hoo.

lately, i have been hanging out with the budfolk, lazing around and perfecting an even sunburn up at north hero, and working shifts here and there between ben & jerry's, the realty office, and i have subsequently spent a number of hours cleaning said realty office. i need money. wisconsin time is nearing. i can't wait to leave. damn, i am going to miss it here.

in other news, i am having my tonsils and part of my nose (inside) removed so that i will regain the capacity to breathe through a) my nose and b) the half of my throat which is currently obstructed by my maniacal left tonsil. so that happens july 6th and puts me out for a week. please stop by and visit. if you bring me sherbert or pudding of any variety (other than meat) i will love you eternally in the event that i don't already.

to keep you all in rapturous love me for giving great suggestions as to what to listen to in your spare time here is a list of cds i  recently picked up. most are silly, but all give me joy. the best tracks are noted in the parenthesis:

Long Way Round - The Dixie Chicks (Not Ready to Make Nice, Bitter End)
Pet Sounds - The Beach Boys (Caroline No, Wouldn't It Be Nice, God Only Knows)
The Be Good Tanyas - " (House of the Rising Sun)
Ganging Up On the Sun - Guster (Satellite, The Captain, Lightning Rod)
Souls Alike - Bonnie Raitt (I Will Not Be Broken)
A Kiss In Time - Patty Griffin (Rain, Long Ride Home)
The John Mack Oboe Recording That Is Currently Blowing My Mind (ask and I will get a copy to you)

and finally, regarding your shellshock that this masterpiece of a blog will be disappearing. just shut up. i have been out of commission on this page for almost a month anyways. i plan on starting a new page out in WI. but i'll post a link. so have no fear my dears.

regular season lacrosse is over. we beat lamoille (again) today and finished off the season 11-3. we should be number 2 or 3 for D2, and having handed U32, the number 1, their only loss, i think i am okay with that. i am going to miss sports seasons for the exercise by force, but i am ready to kick the crap out of this years play-offs, grab my diploma, and catch a plane.  

the art show tonight went well. i had a display board for photog which i had a little bit of pride in. none of my prints were "perfect" but i love each one. that's all. wednesday night was the orchestra concert. we're a big fat unadvertized joke, but the bach double went the best it probably ever has and we managed to hold most of our shit together, so that is always a plus... 

i have to go shower lamoille's sweat and tears off my hands, but i'll put in another rockin update before the week is out. i am so exhausted. the warm weather is shocking my system: since when does a spring day in vermont act like a spring day should? bof. 

much love. good water pressure. pra ram waiting at home. cows. cows. cows. jules.

1. Go to Google images

2. Search for:
Where you grew up.
Where you live now.
Your name.
Your first pet's name.
Your favorite food.
Your favorite drink.
Your favorite song.
Your favorite smell.


Montpelier, Vermont


it is gloomy here today.


I am indeed a wholesome Vermonter  (says Google).


my first dog was from the humane society. his name was otis. go figure.


i do love me some cider donuts.


make lemonade, eh? someone went a bit overboard...


casimir pulaski day in fine form.


i love the smell of fresh snow. usually it's at night. but the mornings are nice too.

ok so i am waaaaaaaaay bored. but here it is, my over-googlization-extrordinatire. i hope you enjoyed this as much as i did. back to boredom. love jules.

1) Get Rich or Die Trying. go fiddy. enough said.

2)  this article which makes the OC finale a lot less heartbreaking.

3) an anecdote: i keep falling asleep on the couch. i get home before midnight, i get home after one, i get home at three in the afternoon-- whenever-- i always fall asleep on the least comfortable couch in the house (the one in the basement, for those of you who've been here) and i always have a moment of "oh wow this will be an uncomfortable place to wake up and man, i should really take out my contacts" but then the prospect of walking up two cold flights of stairs, scrambling around trying to get the contacts out of my eyes, and take the flying leap from the lightswitch into my bed always gets the best of me and i close my eyes and wake up to my parents whispering "why is she down here, again?" and honestly, the answer is that i am pure laziness behind glazed eyed. yick. i know this story wasn't funny, but it's on my mind along with how my arm hurts from my meningitis shot yesterday at my college physical which i really don't want to talk about any further. but i will bitch just enough to say it fucking hurts. wow, that movie really got to me. at least i didn't get shot nine times by a guy with particularly bad aim named Justice. holla.

much love. a place in the fitzsimmons-cardozo wedding party right next to the unicorns. a nickname as cool as unicorn charlie. a julie alert button and some healthy hip bones. shakira, shakira. jules.

i stole this picture from aleah because a) i am in them and b) i wanted to share. yay prom. i think the only person who didnt enjoy it was wally-- but pish posh. it was fun. i am in hell writing my memoirs. boo memoirs.

much love. vitamen water. a winning streak. a superiority complex revealed (ahh st. j adventures). jules.

*YES, THE PICTURE IS GONE. GO TO ALEAH'S LJ AND STARE AT ME THERE*

this is round 89765 of pictures. i was photographed with every person in centeral vermont who ever owned a prom dress. this was the tail end of the batch. but i like it. i also enjoy that you can see my sock tan from twenty feet away in a dimly lit room. i suppose that is the price one pays for being on a lacrosse team whose record is 8-2. sigh.

here is a little glimpse of my fifth period interactions with the fab staff at our school:

i was walking to the water fountain from the back of the cafeteria, trying to unbotton my botched cardigan (i cannot get buttons right for the life of me. it is a curse) and bakey says "jules, just stop, you've got it all wrong" and i am thinging "duh, i suck at buttons" when she turns to ru and whispers from behind her hand, "you know, we don't say the word anymore but she is what we used to call retarded" and that, ladies and gents, seals my case.

i am dumb. take that, optimists.

much love. pra ram prom. keeping the food IN your mouth. emma's joke after-shock laughter. a twenty-dollar prom. jules.

yesterday was my last vyo concert, ever. i am finito. i got my little gold-embellished certificated, handed over the rented english horn, and cried a bit for the lost intrument. it went to carnegie with me. i love it. it is gone.

i am not going to allstates this week so i miss out on real goodbyes with everyone, but that is probably better. hopefully i'll catch up with a few band geeks over the summer, but i'm not too stressed. it just feels as though i have already graduated.

this morning was the ap biology exam. no comments-- that is illegal. har har... but the moral of this story is that i have so little school left and so little obligation left after this week-- i don't know. it feels strange.

and then everyone in the world showed up at the creemee stand at the same time (yes i got a small vanilla cone with toasted coconut dip) and it was hard to believe i am moving to wisconsin in august. i am so nervous. it is redonk.

three big lacrosse games this week. senior skip day (attendance status: unsure) and prom are at the end of this week. memoir writing and statistics wrap-up is in the works. as for the bach double concerto, well, we shall see.

much love. more frequent updates. bfa's ass on a platter. jules.

so tonight was the project grad shake whatcho momma gave you dance (spelling improvised by myself at this late hour) and it was a huge success. as i strutted in with my posse about an hour in, barb informed me that we had broken even. at that point people (meaning seniors who actually count as people, as opposed to the creepy underclassmen guys who stand around watching the upperclassmen shakin it) showed up and while the dancing was bad-- cause it's us, the evening got progressively less awkward. not that it did not have it's moments. and by the way i don't know a single nonawkward dancer. except maybe beth dell, who rocks the dance floor like it's nobody's business. a DDR match between her and ty should be videotaped. or maybe alice versus beth in a dance off alla the al vs. ty showdown at emmett's. i am rambling. it is late. i need to go sleep.

but i am working again tomorrow (long story) and everyone just left. emma, beth dell, al, ru, and don issachar were pulling punk guitar moves in my kitchen. and it has exhausted me. time to sleep. eight hours and six minutes until my shift starts. sheesh, that's no way to live.

much love. mucho dinero. some sweet moves. put your V's up. jules.

i worked today. i got to work with jerry, john, dana, mary, kelly, and shannon-- which is an older crew than you see in tours in the summer months, but it was surprisingly fun. they replaced the satellite radio running all through the factory with a jukebox that only plays "devil went down to georgia" which is pretty hellish, but the seconds in the employee freezer were amazing, so i'll cope. i got shannon's pints too so i brought home four dublin mudslides, a karma sutra core concoction, and a peanut butter cup. not a bad haul. i wouldn't write an entire entry about this, however, i only saw 5 pints of dublin in my freezer all summer with both erin and i taking them home, so i was pretty stoked to get FOUR. goooood stuff.

much love. a cardio specialist. beach party tunes. jules.

P.S. download "All We Have" by Brett Dennen (guy who sings "Desert Sunrise") and you will have an instagood day. (as in, instantly good. LOVE the song).

Put your music player on shuffle. Press forward for each question. Use the song title as the answer to the question. NO CHEATING!

1.) How am I feeling today?
"Space Between" (live) - DMB

2.) Where will I get Married?
"Brick" - Ben Folds Five

3.) What is my best friend's theme song?
"Over and Over Again" - Nelly ft. Tim McGraw

4.) What is/was highschool like?
"Time" - Hootie and the Blowfish (...to move on?)

5.) What is the best thing about me?
"Mr. Jones" - Counting Crows (HELL YEAH)

6.) How is today going to be?
"Goodbye Yellow Brick Road" - Elton John (a change of pace, perhaps)

7.) What is in store for next weekend?
"Sideways" - Citizen Cope

8.) What song describes my parents?
"Close Up" - Gavin Degraw

9.) How is my life going?
"Morning Light" - Graham Colton (groggy)

10.) What song will they play at my funeral?
"The Luckiest" - Ben Folds (yes, i am very fortunate. and once i am dead you can all sit around and think about it. what? i actually don't like this song.)

11.) How does the world see me?
"A Foggy Day" - Ella Fitzgerald & Louis Armstrong

12.) What do my friends really think of me?
"Planet Telex" - Radiohead (spacey? or just OUT OF THIS WORLD!)

13.) Do people secretly lust after me?
"Soul Meets Body" - Death Cab for Cutie

14.) How can I make myself happy?
"Could You Be Loved" - Bob Marley

15.) What should I do with my life?
"Addicted" - Simple Plan (coke. meth. heroine. they're all viable options.)

16.) Will I ever have children?
"What Sarah Said" - Death Cab for Cutie (WAIT what did sarah say- can't tell)

17.) What is some good advice?
"Covered in Rain" - John Mayer

18.) What do I think my current theme song is?
"Echo Park" - Ryan Cabrera (I have never listened to this song before it started playing today. Freaky.)

19.) What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
"Emotionally Drained" - Brett Dennen (haha)

20.) What type of men/women do you like?:
"Colorblind" - Counting Crows (hahahahhahahaha. only if he is Ryan Philippe. thank you cruel intentions...)

21.) Will you get married?:
"Center of Attention" - Guster (I think this means I am too selfcentered. I can buy that.)

22.) What should I do with my love life?:
"Everything's Not Lost" - Coldplay (ouch. wow. at least there is hope.)

23.) What's sex like?:
"Take It Easy" - The Eagles

24.) Where will you live?
"Tiny Dancer" - Ben Folds (... on the bus in Almost Famous.)

25.) What will your dying words be?
"Get Gone" - Fiona Apple (yup. even on my death bed it's a good, hearty FUCK YOU world. oh to be a pessimist.)

------------
just to indicate how damn bored i've been i thought i would steal this from abby. it didnt work very well. but i am no cheater. alas.

much love. a five day easter egg hunt. jelly belly jelly beans. jules.

This is a journal written in response to the quesiton lib ruminated over in her last post. Here are my answers:

1. Montpelier is overextended and overcommitted, and would like you all to note that it is not "too busy," rather, Montpelier is at maximum capacity and, in fact, functions at peak performance when it has a lot to do. Montpelier is actually doing great and would like to ask you all to please stop griping. It's doing it's best.

2. Montpelier is recuperating from an injury on Elm Street and it is really sick of getting such a hard time from all the commmuters from Middlesex and East Montpelier and Barre and things are just really tough right now, but Montpelier promises that it'll all be better soon.

3. It is not busy. There is nothing busy about it. Those damn state employees keeping taking up all the parking places, thus creating the illusion that Montpelier is busy when, in fact, things are slow right now and Montpelier is feeling quite neglected, but no one seems to notice because the same twenty cars keep driving around in loops looking for a goddamn parking place. It is not Montpelier's fault. It is your fault. You don't go downtown enough. How would you feel if all your residents stayed in their homes and offices rather than visited you, huh?

4. During the surge of public works projects which occured in the mid-1900's (yes, the same one that brought you fine folks the Rec Pool), the government came in and redrafted the layout of all the city's streets and parking places. At the time, this project fell into the hands of none other than a young Michael Brown, who you all know as the former FEMA director. As the goverment has never been capable of designing plans that work efficently, Mr. Brown and Big Brother are to blame for any issues citizens may have with the alleged "busy-ness" in the area: leave Montpelier alone. It can't even read. (But then again, neither can Michael Brown.)

5. Talk to I-89 about it, ok?? If people could just drive better, this whole traffic mess could stay out on the highway and Montpelier wouldn't even have to deal with the losers who clog the streets with their goddamn SUVS. A few more people taking drivers ed and buying hybrids could solve this whole problem, gosh! This really has nothing to do with Montpelier. It could have happened to any small town.

ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT. It's vacation. I am bored and have another deadly sinus infection. yuck. SO SUE ME. Yay for all those folks hanging around for the next week and best wishes for all those fine folks trying to fake their way through airport security lines nationwide.

much love. gilmore girls season two. puffs plus. antibiotics. yogurt. an airway to breathe through. jules.

this is a post directed at alice. i love you dear, but since you are on my friends list, you already have a spot on my site. i needed room for my poetry addiction and some donuts. check out the donuts. seriously, they are enjoyable. my links list got an update that i am really proud of. so there. i like it a bunch. it makes my life easier because i can use it for my own selfish purposes to navigate my DSL playground. yup, i'm a dork.

also, everyone is going away. leaving the country, or at very least the state, and so i am left with my oboe and two more days of school before vacation. woo-freaking-hoo. i can not wait to sleep all the time again. it will be my last break before i start work this summer. hopefully. let's just see if i still have a job. i have to run off and make cookies. because that's nice.

much love. grr facebook. clean clothes. a car with an e-brake. jules.

i have new shoes on the cheap. love it. i am such a girly girl when it comes to shoes. call me amelda marcos.

i had a solo today at elley-long with vermont youth strings. i sucked, as usual, but i think the concert went well. i will never cease to be amazed at the talent of elementary school kids. seriously, not that i have tried, but they play their violins/violas/cellos/basses like nothing. and they're midgets. gah. so impressed.

after driving home, i met ru for a co-op tofu extravaganza followed by an evening of SOY WHAT? with bean, isaac, and dell. the night took off down backroads through pothole mazes and ended on north street. i need to work on this curfew thing. but it was fun. and very nutritious. and now i am behind on NaPoWriMo!!

for those of you who are unenlightened, today marks the first quarter of National Poetry Writing Month. all through the month of April, in honor of poetry and it's greatness, participants are asked to write a poem a day. just for the hell of it. it's wicked. read poems. write poems. it is a good time. join on.

much love. guts. soy parfait. soy sauce. soy macaroni. tofu. soy. soy. soy. jules.

the truth about the rain is how it falls and how it falls and how it falls....

sheesh dar williams sings like few other women around these days, i love her voice and have been sucked in by all the lovely corny lyrics. it makes me wish i could sing. allison krauss is cool but she annoys me. and aimee mann just wants to be allison, so basically i am left with rachel bissex and dar. huh. and while i'm on the topic of music: PATSY, please love juanes, or fake it, but your insolence is not going to be tolerated. its juanes or bust here in montpelier. its like an illness sweeping the nation.

...no wait there really is one! you know everyone is sick when you call in to tell your lacrosse coach that you won't be at practice and he says "It's okay Jules, it's a good time to be sick. We've lost a lot of gals lately. Just get better. We'll see you next week." i feel like I'm living in the middle of the bubonic plague. the good news is that i have been sleeping since yesterday at around 1:40 pm. i am almost better. And the weather was mild today so I got to sleep with fresh air in my lungs. i missed an ap bio quiz today and an in-class essay for squier. gar. tomorrow will not be fun, but perhaps i will make another wretched mind map to get out of the quiz. we'll see how motivated my tylenol sinus lets me get.

much love. a panacea. exercise. health, wealth, and a comfy bed. jules.

meaning: if you lover juanes, love him; if for some odd reason dislike this spanish conquistador, no one else cares, we are all simply too busy loving him. juanes rules my mind (as do the bouncy balls on the link in al's site, again, thanks ruthie, but now back to the main show: hhhhhuanes)and it all started in french four.

you see, back in the day, there was this spanish version of People magazine floating around the room with this groooooooooss hairy-ass picture of a hairy man with a unibrow and all this sweaty-wetness going on and let's just say, the picture was not going on. it was creepy. so it became this huge class joke, which only went so far until peter downloaded some juanes and hooked his mp3 player up to bakey's speakers. these broadcasts continued for the duration of the year and many of us ate lunch in the classroom (since we had french next and did not want to be perpetually late like kate, ahem, heh heh) and basically the tradition has carried through into senior year.

i can't get enough. i really can't. good luck to those of you who are living without juanes in your life, becuase you are not yet living.

on a more somber note: i got wait listed at college of the holy cross and connecticut college, and rejected at middlebury. i am stupid. and i called it. so now i am having deep thoughts, pondering, and hating myself more than usual for being another mediocre human and trying to figure out how to do something i will love for the rest of my mediocre existence. i think this mood has something to do with lacrosse tiring the legs off of me and my parents holding their legal guardianship in front of my face like i am a mule and it is a carrot. yeah, not a great time. but i get by, i am alive and well fed, what else do i need? oooh yeah, HAPPINESS. but i'll shut up now.

much love. NaPoWriMo. a bagel stash. la camisa negra. a hottie with a body. jules.

...in your best interest, because i had my last oboe recital with sandra and i am in a foul mood. i hate the mediocre days. being aweful is forgivable and being glorious is admirable but the space between is simply contemptible. blah.

much love. patience. eighteen years of age under your belt so your parents can't force you to go to some college you are not interested in. jules.

honestly, the only reason i have slacked on the updating this week is that the amount of sleep i need has gone from from variable to requiring a substantial prerequisite number of hours of REMs per night for my survival on a day to day basis. seriously. we run for at least a half hour before every practice and THEN we pick up our sticks to do some real work. it's insane and awesome. as of wednesday, we went off of the gym time schedule, THANK GOD, and have been playing outside. it is fantastic.

the sunlight alone is responsible for a shift in my life (although, colleges really split the difference, i hate to tell you all that the sun has help my mental frenzy NOT AT ALL. anyways...) we eat outside now. we sit outside on free periods. we practice outside. it is heaven. i love spring. although, if it gets any hotter too too fast, i may become a dehydrated little me. my water intake, well, it is something we should all work on, yes?

but really, crazy. tomorrow ends the third quarter of my senior year of high school. i graduate the second week of june. saturday is april. let's spell this out, shall we? thirty days hath september, APRIL, JUNE and... ok so april-may-june-GRADUATE: that's a mere 73 days! i know i am reaching, but i am doing make up work right now for all the assignments i managed to avoid all of third quarter. anyways. who cares. i'll hop to it. just wanted to let you all know that i lover you.

much love. stupid like me. those aliens, gosh, don't give them any ideas! it's crackalackin'. jules.